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‘Toy Soldiers’ With Bill Simmons and Kyle Brandt

October 3, 2023 · Toy Soldiers (1991) · Action · Drama · Thriller · 1:37:50

IMDb ↗Letterboxd ↗

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Most Rewatchable Scene

Bill Simmons▶ 23:34Billy's gang mouthwash basement party scene and the roll call scene where Luis Cala versus Joey Trotta play out their confrontation
Kyle Brandt▶ 25:00Agrees with the mouthwash basement party scene, praising it as one of the best boarding school hangs, and supports the roll call scene while critiquing the villain's lack of menace

Big Kahuna Burger Award

Bill Simmons▶ 45:38Spitting in the sandwiches
Kyle Brandt▶ 45:48The drink at the bar in the basement (four parts 100 proof vodka, two parts schnapps, one part creme de menthe)

Picking Nits

Bill Simmons▶ 46:09After half a sip of the vodka they act like zombies when they shouldn't be that drunk
Kyle Brandt▶ 46:05They would be way more drunk after drinking the hundred proof vodka

Den of Thieves Benihana Award

Bill Simmons▶ 46:16The boarding school
Kyle Brandt▶ 46:20The dorms specifically, with basketball hoop and posters (U2, Burton snowboards)

Great Shot Gordo Award

Bill Simmons▶ 46:39The ending group hug with the helicopter shot where it turns into Town
Kyle Brandt▶ 46:47The judge getting thrown out of the helicopter - shooting up at the judge falling

Is There a Better Title?

Bill Simmons▶ 1:02:03Obviously not - there is no better title

Best Quote

Bill Simmons▶ 1:04:19The school gets taken over by terrorists and I'm still on pots and pans

Stephen A. Smith Hottest Take Award

Bill Simmons▶ 1:04:31Wanting a sequel set at a girl's boarding school that could have been made in 1994 with Reese Witherspoon and Sarah Michelle Gellar
Kyle Brandt▶ 1:05:34The hairstyles were deliberately modeled after action movie stars - Sean Astin's hair copied Martin Riggs from Lethal Weapon, and the villain's hair copied Steven Seagal's ponytail look

Casting What-Ifs

Bill Simmons▶ 1:08:34Sean Astin — Discusses John Schlesinger dropping out as director for Pacific Kites, Sean Astin's successful audition opposite Coogan, and Corey Feldman auditioning but not getting cast due to not being 'in the right place'
Kyle Brandt▶ 1:09:40Corey Feldman — Comments that Corey Feldman was probably too old for the yogurt role and was 'coming off the rails' by the early nineties

Movies Referenced (30)

Die Hard (1988)

7 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt▶ 2:59IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Just One of the Guys (1985)

6 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt▶ 1:07:11IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Dead Poets Society (1989)

3 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt▶ 3:09IMDb ↗Lb ↗

School Ties (1992)

3 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 6:40IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Speed (1994)

3 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 18:08IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Teen Wolf (1985)

3 mentions · Kyle Brandt▶ 20:16IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Under Siege (1992)

3 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 18:21IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Air Force One (1997)

2 mentions · Kyle Brandt▶ 18:34IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Passenger 57 (1992)

2 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 15:10IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Scarface (1983)

2 mentions · Bill Simmons▶ 14:25IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Sudden Death (1995)

2 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt▶ 14:45IMDb ↗Lb ↗

The Fugitive (1993)

2 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt▶ 19:01IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Directors Referenced (8)

Andrea Bias

2 mentions · · Known for Black Adam, A Simple Favor, The Intern▶ 0:03IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Daniel Petrie

2 mentions · Bill Simmons▶ 12:09IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Andrew Davis

1 mentions · Kyle Brandt · Known for The Fugitive, Holes, Under Siege▶ 19:18IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Hannah Fay Foligno

1 mentions · Kyle Brandt · Known for Wicked, Oppenheimer▶ 1:05:47IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Iyi Tubi

1 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Ex Machina, World War Z▶ 5:38IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Jim Rome

1 mentions · Kyle Brandt · Known for The Longest Yard, Space Jam▶ 39:50IMDb ↗Lb ↗

John Schlesinger

1 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Midnight Cowboy, Darling, Marathon Man▶ 1:08:34IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Sean Penn

1 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Mystic River, 21 Grams, Dead Man Walking▶ 1:06:36IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Actors Referenced (44)

Bill Murray

11 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons · Known for Lost in Translation, Rushmore, Moonrise Kingdom▶ 2:40IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Sean Astin

11 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 4:23IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Denholm Elliott

7 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons · Known for Trading Places, Raiders of the Lost Ark▶ 55:15IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Jerry Orbach

7 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons · Known for Beauty and the Beast, Dirty Dancing▶ 9:26IMDb ↗Lb ↗

The Pogues

6 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Blown Away▶ 51:52IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Steven Seagal

5 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt · Known for Under Siege 2: Dark Territory▶ 2:31IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Corey Feldman

4 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Stand by Me, The Lost Boys, The Goonies▶ 1:09:13IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Keith Coogan

4 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Adventures in Babysitting, Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, Toy Soldiers▶ 9:51IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Tommy Lee Jones

4 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt · Known for The Fugitive, No Country for Old Men▶ 18:21IMDb ↗Lb ↗

George Michael

3 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for The Silence of the Lambs, Tin Cup▶ 39:35IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Michael Champion

3 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Total Recall, Beverly Hills Cop▶ 8:31IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Bruce Willis

2 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt · Known for Die Hard, Pulp Fiction▶ 4:50IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Writers Referenced (5)

Billy Ray

28 mentions · Bill Simmons, Kyle Brandt · Known for Captain Phillips, The Hunger Games, Shattered Glass▶ 13:50IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Julie Siege

3 mentions · Kyle Brandt, Bill Simmons▶ 18:21IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Roger Ebert

2 mentions · Bill Simmons▶ 21:22IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Dick Wolf

1 mentions · Kyle Brandt▶ 56:52IMDb ↗Lb ↗

William P. Kennedy

1 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for Toy Soldiers▶ 20:47IMDb ↗Lb ↗

Cinematographers Referenced (1)

Kelly Hearns

1 mentions · Bill Simmons · Known for The Incredible Hulk▶ 26:07IMDb ↗Lb ↗